Story of Dear… English version

Cover by myself with image from https://www.pexels.com/

Characters

Writer
Name: Liv Lorenzen
Meaning: Liv -> danish for life, Lorenzen -> son of Loren, Loren is old german word for laurel.
Age: 27 years old
Notes: Is the owner of the diary, is working in a kindergarten
Sex: Female

Husband
Name: Niklas Sloth
Meaning: Niklas -> victory of the people, Sloth -> animal
Age: 30 years old
Notes: Is the future husband of Liv Lorenzen, is in the army.
Sex: Male

Mother
Name: Viola Lorenzen
Meaning: Viola -> a plant, a music instrument in family with Violin, Lorenzen -> son of Loren, Loren is old german word for laurel.
Age: 57 years old
Notes: Is mother of Liv, is working in a flower shop
Sex: Female

Father
Name: Brian Lorenzen
Meaning: Brian -> maybe means hill or high, noble, Lorenzen -> son of Loren, Loren is old german word for laurel.
Age: died in car crash but 60 years old if alive
Notes: Is father of Liv, worked as geologist
Sex: Male

Day 2

Dear dear diary
It is now the day after my boyfriend asked me to marry me in exactly one year starting yesterday. I was just so high afterwards that I could not focus on writing letters inside you but my plan is to write you every day until my wedding day to remind my future self of my ups and downs the year before it happen and maybe as a way to tell the story to my father in the heavens. Yeah I know it is stupid to start with something sad in my diary when it is supposed to be a happy time, but my father died a bit over 3 years ago today just right after he gave me the most beautiful turquoise jade stone and told me that it will help me grow as a person and rightly so. If you have to know he died in a car crash, I am still sad about it from time to time but the jade stone is helping me remember all the good things we have done together over the years from the snow ball fights to the fishing trips. I wish that he could have walked me down the aisle but now I have to do it on my own or maybe get my old mother to do it for me. Anyway the butterflies in my belly has finally stopped flying around like crazy, so guess it is time to sleep.
Good night diary.

Day 3

Dear diary diary
Today was a bit more normal even that my mom are still crazy about that I am getting married. Otherwise it was a pretty normal day. I spend my lunch together with my future husband which reminds I have completely forgot to introduce you to him, his name is Niklas Sloth and his is 3 years my senior so 30 years old. I guess I am just as confused as my mother who I spend the last two hours talking in phone with. I hope she becomes less crazy doing the time before the big day if not she will too much to handle. Of other things I watched three shooting stars tonight when I was taking out the trash and I cannot tell you what I wished for or they won’t come true but I am sure you can guess that the subject was my wedding day. Anyway I have to go to bed now as it is getting late here and I have work again tomorrow.
Good night diary.

Day 5

Dear diary
The boring story or almost boring day to tell you today as it was just a boring Wednesday, work was normal, everybody had calmed down over that I was getting married. I heard a few of my coworker asking each other if I was pregnant too but I did not reply them as they did not ask me directly. I am not pregnant so far I know. Guess writing is good for you as I suddenly remember that today is the 3rd day in a row that I have seen shooting stars. I hope everything is alright in space as I have never seen that many, in so many days in a row, maybe it is just God who tries to bless me even more. Niklas talks about that it is normal for them to appear doing certain periods of the year, guess I want to move to the country so I can watch them everyday but we both need to be close to our work. In case you, my dear diary, are wondering what my job is then I am working in a kindergarten and I love it even my coworkers are sometimes talking behind my back. I do not care about them as I am mostly working for the kids who all loves me very much so I guess that is why they think I might be pregnant too. I wonder how long there will go before my mom will go crazy about me getting a dress for the weeding. Anyway back to the shooting stars, I just watched another one though the window as I am writing this, it was almost turquoise in the light so it most have been full of Barium, which I hope burned all up as it is a bit radioactive. Anyway bedtime now.
Good night diary.

Day 7

Dear diary
The numerous shooting stars is in the news now, sorry for starting in such a rush but since I heard it in the radio in the car on the way to home from work I knew I had to write it as I think I noticed around 12 to 15 of them too. It was a nice sight but even the scientists has no idea of where they come from as they are is nothing in the sky and we are not even close to any of our normal events with lots of shooting stars. Ahhh, thank you for arriving rain so my mind can relax as I have been going nuts the last days especially after hearing the news that the scientists. I wonder what is happening up there, Niklas on the other hand is not scared and has spend the last 3 evenings watching the shooting stars from his window and tried to count them all. I could see on his eyes doing our lunch that he had been up more than one night to look at them. Damm the rain was not alone, it has now been joined by lightnings and I pretty sure thunder will join them both soon. I hate that but guess it is better than the shooting stars as then there is a chance that Niklas won’t be so sleepy at our picnic tomorrow. Yeah I forgot to tell you that we are not living together yet as his apartment is not big enough for both of us and my landlord won’t allow me even I feel like I have plenty of room so we are looking for a bigger one for us both unless we well over a house instead. Far away to get away from the noisy town but still close enough for our jobs. Please go away thunder and lightning so I can get a good sleep too. Thanks for the text, love… you know how much I hate it. Even I can sleep long tomorrow I guess I better sleep while I can in the love rain.
Good night diary.

Day 11

Dear diary
I want to live forever like a white fake rose as I am so happy in my life right now. I know I have mentioned the picnic in the days before but it was just so prefect, with the weather sunny and a light breeze which turned the heat into a nice temperature. We share straw berries with chocolate and whipped cream, I hope we can do that again soon as I really has been tried from work lately. I also got an awesome letter, my landlord has decide that since we are getting married we can move in together so next weekend we will back his stuff and move them here. Then we will see what happens if we finds something better but I cannot wait to wake up in bed with Niklas by my side. Maybe all the shootings stars are bring me luck even I am still getting tried of them as people are not talking about others, even my mom who was so crazy about the weeding less than 2 weeks ago. I know there is still long time for the wedding but still I did not expect something could keep her quiet about it before after my wedding. By the way, I have decided that I want to the theme to be under the sea so instead of black suits I will prefer to have blue and my dress needs to be turquoise to fit the rock my father gave me. I also want to have sushi so we have to find a good restaurant as I want the weeding to be perfect. Wow if I did not know better I would think it was thunder but it was just a shooting star who was a bit bigger than the rest, I really hope that those scientist knows if we are in danger or not as it is getting on my nerves. I do not want to go extinct like the dinosaurs on the most happy year of my life. If a big meteor wants to destroy the earth it can wait to the day after my weeding, not a second before. Guess I need to get to my bed to sleep now or the kids will kill me tomorrow.
Good night diary.

Day 13

Dear diary
Today I am so tried after working extra hours yesterday and I do not have the weekend to sleep because of the move which I cannot wait for. We have been together for 5 years now and now we can finally be together all the time. I hope we can manage as I am sure he is the dream guy for me, just do not know how it will be to live with him. Is it normal to feel nervous? I know you cannot answer but do not know who else to ask. If I ask my mom she go nuts because of the wedding, while none of my friends would understand me as they have all been living together with their men for a long time, only me who had issues with the landlord. I guess we cannot all be rich and perfect from a start. Anyway yesterday extra work has taken my energy so will call it a day and write again tomorrow.
Good night diary.

Day 17

Dear diary
Yes, finally, I am so happy and tired today but today we are two. I am so happy that Niklas is living in the same apartment as me even my landlord was almost changing his mind when he learned that we were not getting married before next year. Good thing my mom could talk some sense into his mind after we arrived with all the packing boxes. My apartment feels like a new place after getting all Niklas’s things inside from his buddha figure taking almost half the window to his old dinning table to he inherited from his old grandma who died a few years back. It was a hell to get inside as I do not have the sight for moving objects though doors but we did it and did not cancel the wedding over it even that my landlord laughed a lot over us. The shooting stars also seem less scary when I am with Niklas, guess I was just scared of dying and leave him alone in this world or the other way around. The scientists still have no clue about why they are here but they are working out from a theory saying that a crash between two big asteroids in the asteroid belt has hit each other and is now giving us shooting stars almost like rain. They are certain we are safe even some of the comets might reach ground.
Good night diary.

Day 19

Dear diary
Today was a simple day as I did not go work because of day off. I have spending time with my mother and we had coffee. We talked about everything from Niklas and I finally living together and crazy enough she already want us to look for a new place because she does not find it big enough for us and a future child. I told her we had no plans of having kids in attempt to stop the talk but instead she just said that I had not been expected to get married either and look at how it went. I guess she is right even I did not make it seem like when we talked. Btw I have completely forgot to introduce you to my mother, well her name is Viola and she is 57 years old and working in her own flower shop so guess we have no problems getting the flowers for our wedding. She was married to my father all his life and has not married or even looked for a new one since he died in the car crash. I really hope he is in a better place now as he was really the best. Right I forgot to introduce him too. Well his name was Brian and was geologist, he gave me the turquoise stone I talked before. I miss him almost daily but I hope that by Niklas entering my home and life for good then I can be more focused on present as I am sure my father wanted that. Guess that was all for today.
Good night diary.

Day 23

Dear diary
Today was both a good and a bad day. Good, the shooting stars disappeared suddenly early this morning. They have been gone since and that least to the bad. The last shooting star I heard was a massive one so it work me up and before I could even think a single thought in my head, Niklas was already up and getting dressed. I asked him what he was doing and he said that his military training told him that the way the stupid stone had sounded, he knew it would had hit the earth not far from us and he had to go search for it to be one of the first reaching it. I got mad as I had plans for us but he rather wanted to search for the rock so there you have it we had our first argument and we have not even share place for a week. I feel sad for arguing with him but I am telling you instead of him because he has not been home yet but there is still no shooting stars so I am sure it was the last one. I am glad they are gone but why did the last one of them had to land close to us. Anyway I am off to bed as I can finally sleep in peace from those rocks.
Good night diary.

Day 29

Dear diary
Today was started like a Saturday any other, Niklas and I had a good day in the park. We had fun eating fresh strawberries and I captured some nice photos of Niklas climbing around like a mad man in the nearby trees. He says it is part of his army training but I am not so sure, I think he was doing it to make me laugh and maybe forget that he was gone for 3 days while he was searching for the stupid rock. Well I cannot say he is stupid now as you might remember for the previous days then he found it before others and he reported the sight to both scientists and the army so now he is pretty famous in our small town. That reminds me I have forgotten to tell where I live, I live in suburb to the town Addersfield which is the the 7th biggest town in Jushuidan, my country. I was so focus on stone and my place in this work I forgot to say that the images I took was a bit weird, like the camera was broken and fixed in the same time as some of the pictures was super great while others was super bad even they should be the same quality. Anyway Niklas is calling for me so we can have hot chocolate and buns for evening snack now that there is no shooting stars to keep us company.
Good night diary.

Day 31

Dear diary
It is weird to think that not long ago there was shooting stars on every clear evening while now they are just as rare as they was before. By now things are more normal as much they can be when you have a famous husband. I have already been asked by 10 different parents about him now and none of them seemed to care much about me before unless something major had happen for their little child. I hate parents at times, but I love spending time with the kids, I wonder if I get to become a good mother or I will become just as awful as them. Niklas says that I shall close my diary for the night as he cannot sleep because of the light for the lamp but I do not mind so I just left him alone in the bed and went down to the kitchen table to have some warm tea and continue writing. I have coffee with my mom doing my lunch break once more as Niklas was called to the army to talk about the rock but that is life I guess. I cannot be with him all the time even I want to. I wish some of his famous rock find dropped some of the magic on me so I could get some more friends instead of just being the future wife who is asked about him. I love him so I guess I should not care much about it and now I will go to bed so he does not feel like I am annoyed on him.
Good night diary.

Day 37

Dear diary
Today is my parents 27th wedding day so off course that means my old mom is sad and down while I am more normal even he of course meant a lot to me too. The rock he gave me the day before the crash really means the world to me and I am talking to it almost daily just like I am writing down in this diary. Niklas finds me weird at times when I do that but then I just say that he went to search for a rock too and which then makes him laugh loudly. My father was a good man, he worked as geologist which was how they meet in the first place. He was out looking for rocks that he could study when my mother was out looking for flowers she could sell and by pure luck they was searching the same place. My father knew he had found the treasure when he watched my mom but he was never good with words which was one of the reasons he had become a geologist while my mother loved the nature and wanted to give people a chance to get it inside their houses. She was the speaker of the two and soon they was having milkshakes at the local bar before they really fall in love with each other. I wonder what type of rock he would give her this year as he always found the most beautiful rocks and gave her, I guess he would have found the meteorite before Niklas unless they have decide to go hunting together. I never knew that Niklas liked rocks before he wanted to search for the meteorite but guess you learn something new every day. I spend a hour with my mom on the phone because she needed to talk about father so now I miss you too. She would not come because she was busy in the shop because of a weeding but we still found time to visit your grave. I do not know what happened to you other than that car crash. Live never ends the way you expect it too. Now I will sleep while holding your beautiful rock in my hands.
Good night diary.

Day 41

Dear diary
Today was a bit weird day as even it was normal then it was still different. Niklas and I was relaxing after the day’s work and I complained to him about the kids while he talked about the military and just as he mentioned that that the airforce was looking for new pilots, we watched a pair of F-16 fly over our house. I knew he was was in the army not the airforce so did not worry much about them until he mentioned he might join them but when he saw my look in his eyes, he quickly changed and said it was just an idea he got as his squad leader had found him a great match for it but if I did not like it he would stay on the ground. I smiled and replied I would prefer his stayed on the ground but if he really wanted to go flying in the old F-16, he should know he could go if he really wanted if he promised he would take care and call every time he was going flying. He laughed at me and replied he would but he did not have any plans of going beside he would not fly the old shit but some newer plane named FX-1736z which was both faster and more safe for the pilots. I guess I better go to bed so Niklas do not get angry about the light or that his pilot dreams are in here.
Good night diary.

Day 43

Dear diary
Today was a good day, Niklas had time for me so we was in the park for a walk before leaving it and went to the beach for a swim even the water was so cold. He brought ice cream so my teeth started chatter so much he started warming me up with his own towel, leaving him wet and cold from the water. We quickly entered the car and drive home. We had plans for the evening too but sudden radio news killed the mood on the way home as they told that the scientists has found the reason for all the shooting stars which has been appeared. They said there are a meteor on the way against the earth but we did not have to worry as it will fly right past us but maybe it will give some more shooting stars. They said the reason they made it so important news was because it was the first time at meteor from another solar system would enter ours and fly though it. Normally the meteors we have flying around us are either super small or so far away it does not matter about them but this one is both unique in that plus it would be big enough to notice on the night sky as it grows doing the next 3 weeks. Niklas is calling me and the way he sounds then his mood is for sure back, not sure about mine though as the shooting stars annoys me.
Good night diary.

Day 47

Dear diary
There is not much to say today as it is just another day with work, cleaning and some news about the meteor. I watched it before I went to bed and yeah I understands why the scientists was worried that it would cause mayhem. Please continue to stay away shooting stars as I am not missing your stupid sound. If they appear again I will start sleeping with music in my ears.
Good night diary.

Day 53

Dear diary
Today when I was out shopping I noticed a military truck appear and to jumped the soldiers. Each of them had a piece of paper in their hands and they ran to the nearest post and hang up the paper before running back to the truck again. I did not get to see if Niklas was part of the group so I asked him when he came home and yeah he was part of it just not in our town. I asked him what the note was about and he just said it was the general who wanted to make more people join the army and watch a military show. At first I was like wow, sounds interesting but now I am confused about it as why would they want more people when people are joining as crazy this days anyway and if it is just a show why did that not just show the show and not mention you can join. Sorry Niklas it is just a bit confusing for me. I will do my best to support you but you know I hate war and such. I am glad I have you my dear diary as if not I would maybe have a hard time sleeping. The bed is calling my name now.
Good night diary.

Day 59

Dear diary
Niklas and I have now live together for almost 2 months and have been playing to get married in the same amount. Today we had our second argument, I am not angry at him but I am angry at the general and the rest of the goddam army. Sorry for my choice of words. Niklas told me, that the general has said that all military people has to go to the camp for 6 months training and he will maybe not get permission to come home doing that period. I am so annoyed that my mind is going crazy. After the 6 months there is around 4 months left to our weeding and we need to get all the things ready. I know 4 months is a long time but still what if he get hurt doing training so we have to go to hospital and stay there for longer periods. I know we have only planned the day but the church is very busy doing the time of the year so I am worried I cannot get a new date. I told him I wanted him here and then he can always go on training when he is back from our honey moon. We became so mad at each other that I am sleeping alone while he is out with some of his friends. I am sorry for making a mess Niklas, I just want you whole and alive for our wedding day. Anyway will try to sleep now and guess this is one of the reasons Monday is a bad day.
Good night diary.

Day 61

Dear diary
Niklas and I is better again but today Niklas got a call and even he did not want to go the general told him that he need to start his training next Monday. I am still a bit annoyed about the training but it sounds like the general has decide and not Niklas. I do not want him out of our home before we are friends again and I just realised that I was wrong in our argument as I thought that Niklas just used the general as an excuse to leave for training when he knew how much I hate the military but it was really his general who has decide to train them all. I wonder why they cannot come home doing the period. Anyway I will have some fun with Niklas now instead of being angry with him so no more diary today.
Good night diary.

Day 67

Dear diary
Sorry I have been so focused on Niklas going to the army for 6 months training and all the problems it has created. Well yesterday Niklas left as planned and now I am alone in the apartment, good thing I still have my mother I can is it from time to time. I do not know how to feel anymore as things quickly changes before we know it and I guess I need to learn that the army is Niklas work while I am working in the kindergarten. We are very different but still so good together which was why I feel in love with him 5 years ago in college. I was the nerdy girl and he was one of the lower footballer, he did not always play the matches but he was good enough for the team. I still remember the day we kissed the first time under the stadium seats. At that moment I knew that I wanted to spend my life with him. We missed prom as he was suddenly drafted to the army after his college years but I still knew that we was going to be together so even I was alone between the other students and people who was supposed to be my friends I did not care. He started earning money as part of the military job he got and I started to work at a kindergarten because it would make it easier for us to meet at times. It was a good time back then and now I just have 10 months left before I will get married with him so cannot wait to live with him forever and nothing can take him away from me. My eyes want to cry now so guess I need to sleep so I can get up for work tomorrow as it is already past midnight. He promised he would call me when he got the chance.
Good night diary.

Day 71

Dear diary
5th day and life is turned upside down as finally has Niklas called me again, he did not have much time but he told me that he loves me and that the training is harder than expected. I think he told me to make me laugh off him and the crazy generals plans. I missed him taking half of the bed so what can I say, I think it worked. I laughed like a maniac but he knows I do that so he was not surprise. I also miss being able to talk to him doing dinner, speaking of dinner I have still not learned to make dinner for one instead of two, guess learning habits is easy but returning to the old ones is harder. I thought it was the other way around. I called my mother right after we finished talking so now my mother is coming over for coffee tomorrow. I have been so nervous about Niklas and his training that I have been focused on work and tv. It is going to be nice talking to her tomorrow. It is only 9pm now but my eyes are heavy after days without the best sleep.
Good night diary.

Day 73

Dear diary
I miss Niklas a lot now but I guess I just have to work hard just like every other wife who has a husband in the military. I love Niklas a lot and I really hope he knows that as even I know he just training then I am worried like those wife’s who has husbands who fly for the airforce. I want to stop worrying about him but it is hard when you do not know anything about his training. He did talk about some plane when the f-16 flew over our place some time ago and he have not mentioned anything about not flying so maybe he is flying without telling me. Anyway I need to work like I normally do as those kids are not stupid and if I keep acting strange to them they will start talking about me to the other teachers and we cannot have that. Tomorrow I will be normal again and work hard being the best teacher there is for those kids. I love my job, my husband, my country so please god, do not change my life right now other than bringing home Niklas soon.
Good night diary.

Day 79

Dear diary
Thank you dear god, I think you heard my prayer doing church today as Niklas called and without going into details he talked about training more than just saying it is hard like before. He says he has not been showering for days while the general is talking about giving him, his own group of men to lead as the general feels like he can lead them. I agree with the general as I believe that too. I can feel it while he was home and the way he asked me to marry him was not just a question but an order between the kind words. I felt my heart was his so I did not care about the order in his words and I still do not. Anyway I asked him if he was going flying in stupid planes and without a single second as break he replied no because he wanted to lead the group of men instead, my mind is now more at easy so even we are not together now then I do not mind he is in the army anymore. Not sure if it is the wine or me who is writing this crap, I am sure I will be more pissed once he has not called me for a week again or something like that. Anyway the comet the scientist talked about is really getting big on the sky and I am glad to know that it is not going to hit us or I would be demanding Niklas home this instant so we could spend the last days and hours together. Another Monday is about to start so I guess I need to sleep now.
Good night diary.

Day 83

Dear diary
Forget all the happiness talk I did the last days as today I am missing Niklas so much that even being with my mom all afternoon has not made my mood better. We even had Sushi from my favourite sushi place and I am still seating here crying because he has not call for 4 days. What the beep is wrong with my body. Guess I will start counting down to his home instead of our wedding. It is already late now and I do not know if I want to sleep or keep writing this dairy. I really hope that I can keep this one a secret for the world as I do not want to share so many details about my life. I want to remove all the bad things happening and only keep the good thing. What do you think, my dear almost 3 month old diary? I have no clue about why people even write this thing in the first place. Anyway you can sleep outside tonight will you are thinking about my question.
Good night diary.

Day 89

Dear diary
Today Niklas called, he could not tell much other than he is trying to get permission to call me more often but he says it is hard to find time for sleep, training and me on the same time as they are pushed though a lot of training. I tried to keep my voice down but it is hard to be alone at home and only talk to your mother some days, while his famous rock search is no longer making people talk fondly about us. Do he understand how hard it is for me to be called a bad wife, when my husband is never there and there is already rumours about what has happen as no one believes he is training with the army as no of the other soldiers has been called for the training but I believe in my husband when he says he is out training with the other soldiers as why would he lie to me. He was the one wanted to move in after my landlord allowed it and he was the one asked me to marry him in a year, I was just the happy girl in all that. I am tried of being a military wife when all people talk bad about us plus the feeling of missing him when he does not call is so hard too. Anyway I want to try sleep now as for some reason I have to open up the kindergarten tomorrow even I am normally one of those who close it.
Good night diary.

Day 97

Dear diary
Today Nicklas suddenly stood in the door with all his army clothes including gun and told me that he had a few days off because the leaders of the army wanted him fresh Monday. I called my boss right away and took Friday off so we could have all the time possible together. Nothing and I mean nothing will keep me away from him the next days. I am so happy he surprised me that way as I had no clue about it. My heart is still beating like a machine gun being fired, not complaining at all and guess I am going to put my diary away for the next days unless something major happens. See you Monday diary.
Good night diary.

Day 101

Dear diary
I am far from calm now, so if my words do not makes any sense at all then all the questions about the universe has just been answered. The special news on tv just told that aliens has arrived in the capital less than 100km’s from here so I guess happiness and sadness is like ying and yang as Niklas was order back to military already yesterday without any reason so we missed an evening together and today aliens. I am so shocked about I do not know what to do or think. I am a woman who believe in God, and my point is not that I expected us to be alone in the universe but I did not expect us to get visit from some planet in my life time. I do not know what to think or say anymore, I am so chocked and never believed that my life would change so much in 100 days since I started writing this diary. My boss called me afterwards to tell me that aliens or not I am still going work tomorrow beside they have not landed yet. I wonder if he is just as confused as me as who in their right mind can continue their normal life after this.
Good night diary.

Day 103

Dear diary
Niklas called and told me his side of things today. He had tried to call earlier but the command has closed the phone lines as they had to prepare instead of focusing on their civilians. Niklas say he had watched a lot of movies as kids about aliens attacking the earth but he did not believe them to be evil in real life. Thanks to him, I am now worried about us as I have never seen any alien movie but the tv is not showing anything else other that movies or news. I wonder what will happens next as the aliens has still not landed or shown any signs of life but the airforce has been flying around the UFO like ants on an ant-hill. I overheard the tv mention the scientist who was the one who had discovered that the comet was not a comet but an advanced from transportation of the aliens. The rock has placed itself between the moon and the earth so it was super easy to spot now while the UFO was only a small part of the big object. Scientist around the world was now trying to be the first to pick up the radio-waves from the ship or should I say ships as in my craziness I forgot to mention than since they arrived at our capital 2 days ago, UFO’s has appeared near other capitals, from Tokyo, to Beijing, and even as far away as Berlin. I am having hard time sleeping but the parents who brings their kids to the kindergarten looks even worse so I keep forcing myself to work even I want to stay home just in case that Niklas calls.
Good night diary.

Day 107

Dear diary
For some reason has Niklas been able to call me every day since the UFO’s arrive, maybe even the leaders of the military can see it is a good idea to keep the military wife’s calm and that way keep the public more calm as people are slowly going nuts over bad sleep and no reaction from the aliens. I do not mind them, they reminds me of the old hippies you learned about in school. I wonder how many of them are smoking some weed this moment. The only problems I have today is that for some reason the phone line to Niklas military installation suddenly stopped working and those annoying shooting stars appeared again, but without sound so at least I can sleep in peace. I guess I will try to sleep now so the shooting stars do not get a chance to annoy me.
Good night diary.

Day 109

Dear diary
Fuck, fuck, fuck. I am sorry for swearing in this lovely book but I am far from ok, the tv plus all the electric in the town just disappeared after a reddish coloured beam suddenly left the UFO and hit the ground on living TV. I have no power and if you look against the capital you can see the reddish light appearing again and again as the only light in the entire area. Shit things just got even more crazy 5 planes from the airforce just flew above my head. Yes I am outside before you ask any stupid questions. Please just be a dream, I love you Niklas, our town is still whole so please come home alive too. My phone is not working either so have to go to my mom even I am not sure it is a good idea to leave my home. Power is back so things are normal again. I am still going to my mom this instant.
Good night diary.

Day 113

Dear diary
It been 4 days since the mysterious reddish light appeared and I have not heard from Niklas other than the bass is telling us all is good and that I shall stop spamming the phone lines as they need to call other people too. I want to walk to the military bass but the town has been place under laws by the military and we can only go to work or buy food. My mom is doing fine and says that I should stop worrying about Niklas as she is sure he is fine and that the army is just busy taking care of the other towns like ours. I miss him and which he will call me back soon or even better get reassigned to our town so I can see him while he works at least. The reddish light is really annoying my sleep so good thing the light in the evening last longer so I can start falling asleep normally. I am still shocked about the arrivals of the aliens and even that the news goes on and on and on and on about them we still have not yet seen a picture of them but guess I am just too busy at work.
Good night diary.

Day 127

Dear diary
Great, just great. Niklas has still not called me back and I have been sick yesterday with lots of puking so nothing major have happen other than being sick. I am never sick so I wonder what is happening to me. I have now puked so much in two days that I have completely lost my appetite, even water which is tasteless makes me want to puke, I am also having headache but at least the reddish lights from the capital has stopped. I am started to wonder how my father would have reacted to all of this as he was the most down to earth man I have ever known. I miss him and Niklas a lot right now as this sickness annoys my life. The clock only says 7.37pm but I will sleep now and hopefully I am fresh tomorrow.
Good night diary.

Day 131

Dear diary
The sickness is still there but at least I know why I am sick now. I am pregnant, I have no idea why I did not just take a test when I started feeling sick but maybe all this craziness of the world this moment has clouded my judgment. I am still home resting as it is still so new for me and for a change my boss wanted me to be at my best before going back to work. I think I can go back to work tomorrow. I have still not heard from Niklas anything but at least the female operator in the other end made a promise that he would be granted permission to call as soon as he returns to base so my dear husband he could learn the great news. Sorry was so focused on telling you that I had not heard from him that I forgot to tell it was my mom’s idea that I should take a test and that I was pregnant. I guess I will sleep so I can dream of the happiness that my child will bring.
Good night diary.

Day 137

Dear diary
Life has returned to normal except that have started eating for two people now but guess that better than no news. My mom still says I should try to forget about Niklas and focus on my life at the moment as the child can feel anything. I guess she is right so I will do that and with the rules about leaving house has been lifted again I am now trying to walk at least 2km after work. The kindergarten is already buzzing about that I am pregnant and the kids are all asking me things I have no clue to answer. The weather on the other hand is bad and it rains a lot but I do not mind as I am smiling and walking around inside with all the kids from kindergarten. Please, pretty please let Niklas call soon as that is the only small sadness in my life and even the news is started to slow down on the news about the aliens so I wonder what is going on in the capital so here is too hoping he is home soon and doesn’t need to protect or save the world anymore. I cannot to hear what he has to say when he learns it, I really hope he is will be as happy I am.
Good night diary.

Day 139

Dear diary
Please help me, if I do not get though this please tell my husband Niklas that I love him and that he was going to be a great father. I miss my mother and wish she could be here too but with the tanks shooting. I cannot go anywhere and I only feel safe here in the basement. Finally the noise stopped, am I safe now? I hear people screaming so is that a good sign as I can only see smoke outside. I am writing as fast as I can incase this is my last words then I am glad I got to experience life. Two plans just flew over my house, so close that the smoke disappeared and I can see soldiers entering broken buildings so I am glad to be alive. God, please help me to know what Niklas is doing this moment and why he has not call yet. I see, only dead humans but no sign of the so-called aliens, I am going back to my apartment now and call my mom to hear if she is good. The sign of normal red blood worries me as if only humans fell doing this attack and no aliens is part of the fallen, then it is for sure an uneven war. I wonder who will be the hero who saves us. Will write more if more happens today.
See you soon, diary.

Day 149

Dear diary
Niklas, where are you? I miss you, I need you and please be alive. The soldiers around here says that they are ready for any attack the aliens can bring if they return. All the news talks about that the aliens attacked and even it has costed lives then we have won every major battle so far. I wonder why we have not been sent to a military camp or something as I do not feel safe here even that soldier are walking the streets while tanks drives around like normal cars. The base still cannot give me any news on Niklas so when will I am getting awake by two men in uniform telling me his is death. My mom says I should just worry about getting enough food for the baby in case the aliens attacks again. It feels like she changed while blaming me. Shit there the reddish light was again, fuck an explosion not far away guess I need to run to the basement now before I get caught up here doing the attack. Good thing I have placed a madness and some food in my basement room just to be sure.
Good night diary and I hope to be alive tomorrow.

Day 151

Dear diary
My house is completely destroyed, luckily I was out getting cans of food, now I am standing on our train station waited to get transported to some old military bunker we used doing second world war. Not sure if it is any good but I guess it is better than nothing. My mom is standing beside me and talks about how her mother used to the her about the second world war and how everything was dark and full of death. She has lost her focus as she does not even care that I am writing in my diary and the stories from her mouth is very confusing and hard to believe is true but at least I know she is alive which is more than I can say about Niklas. That reminds me I managed to get my turquoise stone from my father with me before leaving so I am not losing my only memory from him if my mother ends up being nuts by all the attacks and aliens around us. Finally the train is here so let us see if there is any room for us or the army will take all the room. No matter what I do not think I get more time to write. Niklas please return from the war soon, so we can be a happy family with the little new one on the way.
Good night diary.

Day 157

Dear diary
Well we managed to get on the train and get to the bunker. I wonder how long we have to stay down here before they let us out again. The soldiers talks about months as they have no idea about what to do against those aliens and we are running out of options other than nukes and whatever of strong and deadly weapons. There has been no news of any country using them yet but you never know what sick fucks rule the countries around the world who feels like they need to use them or worse what if the aliens get their hands on them. They can be smarter than us and use them ourselves, maybe that is why we have not attempted to use them yet or maybe the aliens is shielded inside the spaceships. Anyway the train ride and my pregnancy took my energy so will get some sleep now while we at least feel safe.
Good night diary.

Day 163

Dear diary
I have only been in the bunker for less than 2 weeks and even without my mother’s crazy talk then I feel like the soldiers is watching me with lust as I am one of the few younger women around and I am sure that some of the men misses their wives and holding her close. I hope Niklas can keep his focus on me wherever he is. I longs for his touch, his kiss and watching him smile but at least I feel safe her in the bunker even for the looks of the men. We are not told about how the war with the aliens is going but I can see that not all of the men who leaves for the war comes back alive but at least it seems like we have food enough as so far I have been able to gain some weight and even with a baby inside all seems good about that. I can see the baby walking around in the bunker for me but I prefer that the aliens is sent back where they comes from so we can return to our normal lives again. My mother is taking much of my awaken time so even I say I miss Niklas, it been a while since I last tried to contact him or rather find someone who can help me with that as I have not seen any phones here and my cell phone has stopped working because of no signal down here. Maybe I should use my powers as a lady to seduces a soldier to bring me to the command centre or whatever that can give me some news. Time for bed even that the missing sun light, makes me have a hard time falling asleep or know when to walk up.
Good night diary.

Day 167

Dear diary
I am writing this in cold rain while being all alone. I am sure you wonder what has happened and I am even surprised that I managed to get out as the bunker was like a maze especially when you are being chase by aliens. I am still shaking by all the events and I am surprised I managed to get out with my diary, my father’s stone but not my mind. I wonder if she survived. I have not seen people since the attack and I am hiding in some bushes under a big which use to have lots of homeless people around. I do not know what to do as for a moment I felt safe even with the eyes from the men on me. I only know one thing I need to survive for Niklas and the baby. I wonder how the aliens found us as the bunker is deep under ground. Maybe it was 3 floors down in a horseshoe form ground plan plus the soldier was guarding the entrance all the time. I have to ask Niklas about that when I find him or rather when he finds him. I know it is not safe to sleep alone but I am so tried after all the running and with a baby inside it is not so easy.
Good night diary.

Day 173

Dear diary
I have walked around in the left overs from my town in around a week now, survived by eat food which has been left behind when the aliens attacks. I wonder if I should try look for someway to escape the town or if I should stay here in case Niklas gets back. I also find it crazy that I have not found any fellow humans yet but I guess that is good as then I have plenty of food myself and the baby. I am started to think of names for it as I have no way of knowing or figuring out what sex my kid is having, sometimes I even wonder if the child inside is still alive after our crazy journey together. Anyway back to the names I am think about Adam if it is a boy or Eve if it is a girl and before you judge me, dear reader. I am not super religious or anything like that but I feel that if I survives the madness we are going though now then I am for sure going to show god a little fate for a change. The sky is full of beautiful stars tonight and if you close enough at the stars you can forget the troubles of the day for a moment. Of course the red flashes appears too as a reminder of what is going on. Guess I need to sleep now as you never know when you get the chance again.
Good night diary.

Day 179

Dear diary
My name is Liv which means life in danish so far I am told which is exactly what I am trying to be, a life that won’t give up no matter how much the odds is against you. As you know I have not found any food the last 2 days so I have not been asleep either but I am saved once more as a group of people found me and I am now together with 20 people. They have food enough even for me. I am so grateful that they found me and save me as I am not sure how long I would have survived alone after the food had disappeared. The group of people is a mix of old men, young women and several kids but even we have almost no weapons to defend ourselves than they talk about forming a resistance just like people did doing the cold war and the second world war of course. Their leader has told me that even I am new, then some members of the resistance has heard stories about that I can shoot, so I won’t be the lowest person in the food chain. Guess Niklas idea of learning me to shot finally paid off even I am yet to see any guns or rifles between the people here but maybe this is just a small outpost of some bigger network of resistance fighters. I got a soft bed to sleep in today which is for sure better than those rocks I use to sleep since leaving the bunker. I hope my mother has been found a group too and maybe even Niklas is leader or something in this resistance. The words from my fingers is started to ramble so guess I will sleep now but so many things happened today and it is hard to get it out at one time.
Good night diary.

Day 181

Dear diary
Time flies even that there is war around you. The little resistance that have found me, has grown big 5 members the past day so now we are 25 people. The new ones had guns and without giving me a choice it was decide that I should at least have one of the guns as they all talk about how good I am at shooting. Good thing the guns first arrived here today as my energy has been so low that I worried I would have shot myself in the foot if handling a gun. We also found a working radio and while it is peace and quiet here, they talk about that several towns around the world has already been burned down to the ground but we, humans, are not giving up. The Americans are still going nuts with all the army equipment so there is a chance we will make out of this alive. Not sure I believe the news as the news reporter repeated the same news 3 hours later. I know the leader is with on that. Which reminds me I have not introduce you to him yet, his name is Adam, he is 53 years old and a former sales man before the little alien war we have at the moment which also reminds me that I have to cross out Adam for my child as I am not sure Adam, the leader would think highly of it. Anyway we talked and decided to turn off the radio to save the power we had plus we had to start looking for more food or maybe a military outpost because the growth of the group, takes it told on the food. Guess that was all that happened today.
Good night diary.

Day 191

Dear diary
I guess things are going the right way as even we have found no outpost yet we have made our own as we have managed to travel to a mall which is not completely destroyed and still have food in big quantities so even we not are 30 people, things look bright again. Of course we still need to be on a look out for the aliens as I am sure they will know we will search for places like that unless they do not sleep or eat like we do. Sometimes the nights are noisy as hell so I guess they maybe are not or maybe they are so many that they can rest the day soldiers and attack with new ones doing the night. We have still not been able to see them so I have no idea what we are fighting against. I do not really want to know as even I am on guard duty I would prefer not to fire my gun as I am worried what the sounds will do to my baby, speaking of which it is getting harder because of my belly to walk around and I am a bit worried that the others have notice my belly and think about leaving me behind. Good that we found the mall with so much food and so far leader Adam has not told me any bad rumours about me as I feel he would be the first to tell me if the other’s was annoyed on me. Maybe my status as shooter still protects me, who knows. Anyway I need to sleep now so I can wake up at 3am for another night guard.
Good night diary.

Day 193

Dear diary
Today I almost shot a man, not that I am killer or that I wanted to but a group of soldier appeared in the edge of my sight from my view point at the rooftop of the mall. They was suddenly there and the way they acted when I noticed them I thought they were aliens. I hit the ground beside the first man and he has already laughed twice with Adam about it so guess he is not complaining about a female shooter. They talked about that they have a small outpost not far from here and they was here searching for food. I used the chance to ask if they knew anything about Niklas or his base but they was from far away here so they did not even know what area they was in. Even they did not bring any news about Niklas I am still happy that they are army guys as I felt that they are way better to defend us than we are. We will stay here for the night and tomorrow we will travel to their outpost where I will maybe use the secret lines to call Niklas base and get some news. I miss him and my mother but I have no idea of how to call her, she is not answering her phone but I do not know if it is the network or her phone itself. I will try to get some rest as it is starting to get hard walking with this baby and need some energy for the walk tomorrow if there is far to the outpost.
Good night diary.

Day 197

Dear diary
We have now been at the outpost for few days and it is kinda small so I have no idea why we did not just stayed in the mall when the food was there and other than no soldiers around, life was pretty good. Adam has decide that I will be the second in command of the civilians. Not sure why that matters so much to him now we are part of an army group so we do not get to decide anything anymore plus I am not able to hide my pregnancy anymore even I wanted to because I feel like people are looking down on me after learning it, maybe they have been looking at me all the time and maybe they are tried of this war against the aliens. Which reminds me it is funny to think that around 200 days ago no one knew anything about aliens and we was all in peace with the universe while still fighting ourselves and by ourselves I mean human against human. Now we are walking together if the news from the soldiers are believed. Before that it was the army with the strongest weapon who would win. I am not sure I wanted a war against the aliens but I am happy that the world connected when needed instead of acting like monkeys. I am still surprised that we have not lost the war yet even after all the reddish lasers on the sky. Speaking of skies, I am going to sleep with music in my ears as those annoying shooting stars has reappeared, guess it is good to have your music collection somewhere else than all that streaming places which are down now. Too bad, I did not do that to any movies or I would for sure have been a popular woman. I will listen to the music even the soldiers told me not to as we need to be prepared in case the aliens attack, don’t worry my love, the headset is far from noise cancelling so I will wake up by your first scream. Night my dear fellow humans.
Good night diary.

Day 199

Dear diary
If I did not know better I would say that the war was already over as nothing have happened the past days other than a small trip to the mall to check for food and other necessary things which I told you about yesterday. I am still sore in my body for the walk even it was not that far or hard but we have to walk together. I am not sure if it is the hormones from the pregnancy or if I am really happy but I am started to smile a lot more and the eyes that I felt looking down on me has either stopped or have never been there in the first place. Guess the only issue I am having at the moment was Adam attempt to become my new husband as for some reason he likes my looks even that I am with another mans baby. I told him right away that even I am having no idea about Niklas then he is never going to take his place as he is way to old for me. Adam looked fine after a firm no and I had no reason to pull my gun, guess he was still missing his old wife or what he had before the aliens as seen him drink a lot when talking about love. I miss Niklas so much and I hope that he soon finds his way here or somehow contacts me. Anyway time for my even music as they shooting stars has appeared again, I wonder if they really are rocks falling to the shy or something else but I am not in mood to focus on the bad things as I want my child to feel great inside my tummy.
Good night diary.

Day 211

Dear diary
I completely forgot to write you today, guess my mind was somewhere else as life is just slow here and it was a nice dream until a certain baby woke me up with his tiny steps from inside my belly. I am so happy that I started cry when it first happened earlier today, right after a former midwife told me that it was the time for me to stop working and focus on myself and the baby. She told me, it was pretty normal to feel them now so I was so happy I felt them too as I have been a bit worried about him inside. Yes I have the feeling it is a boy and I will named him after my father Brian if Niklas returns if not I will name him Niklas after his father. I hope his favourite colour will be Turquoise like me so he can get the rock my father gave me so he can keep the family legacy. I hope you get a longer life than your grandfather and promise me, no cars. Yes little one, you need to sleep now so I can be fresh and full of energy tomorrow and take care of you while waiting for your father. I know I know, you want to meet him and if I was laying on my belly I am sure you would carry me all the way to him this instant but it is night and we need to sleep now in the moonlight and the sound of Mike Oldfield playing his famous Moonlight shadow once more.
Good night diary.

Day 223

Dear diary
I should be dead but somehow I am alive. I should be looking for food and not write this stupid diary. Sorry diary I cannot focus my mind right now as the outpost was just attacked but somehow I escaped by getting down in the servers and have not seen a soul in 4 hours now and the sounds from explosions and what ever else a battle brings has died out too. I am so alone now and I am wondering if I should go back to the ground level as I am never going to be found by either humans or aliens down here. I only have the gun that Adam gave me, maybe I should just use it and end my life as I am so alone in this world and war. No news from Niklas, Viola or the army bass for that matter. No I will not give up I will travel to Niklas base tomorrow and wait for him there but first I need to sleep if my mind will let me sleep and escape those horrors which just happened. I am not sure why we did not get sent there in the first place, maybe the soldiers was too out number to save us or maybe they was enjoying having women nearby. Beep, no one gave me a chance to survive doing the attack but still I m the only one alive now. I lost my phone so cannot listen to music to calm my head and I am sure even you can feel my scared feelings now, my dear baby. Mommy loves you and I will survive for you and Niklas. Sorry I even thought of ending my life, I won’t do that mistake again. I most sleep now and stop thinking, or rather the other way around.
Good night diary.

Day 227

Dear diary
Today I am so happy that I did not go back to Niklas base but instead went to the mall instead as you never guess who found me there. Niklas plus a small group of soldiers, they are the only one who survived the attack on their base which was attack around the same time as the outpost I had been living in. Niklas had just returned to the base because been called back but by the aliens attacked the base before he could reach it and he happened to find the man who had been answering all my calls about Niklas and he had told Niklas about the outpost. Niklas had searched the outpost and had been super worried for me when he could not find my body between the dead. He decide to go to the mall after a few days of thinking and now we are together once more. Of course I have told him the happy news of him being the father of our child and he was so happy. Brain was happy too as he started kicking so much, all the men got a chance to feel the life from him, removing some of the sorrow they was carrying. Their eyes told me enough so have not asked Niklas about their missions and now he is sleeping next to me while holding a hand on my belly. I guess I will sleep now too as I have no idea of what tomorrow will bring to us.
Good night diary.

Day 229

Dear diary
The past two days has been wonderful as I am together with Niklas once more and we are talking about everything which has happened to me and our future child. We have not talked much about his life since we last was together but guess I do not want to know either. I also feel more safe with Niklas around than I was with the stranger soldiers. Not that I did not respect the others I just felt that they did see me as a woman and you never know what kind of things goes though the head of a man who had been though war. Niklas is the leader of the group so the rest of soldiers follows his command and at the moment we are searching for two things, survivors and food. I showed them the mall and we got a lot of food from there but as I knew when I was with the civilians the mall are not a safe place for us to be so we need a new place. Niklas says that the aliens are mainly attacking towns full of people so maybe we will travel the water spring lake and the forest around it as we can catch fish there and we will not be near any town. I find it a good idea but I need help but he says he will help me in anyway he can. I guess Niklas is so happy he found me alive as his hands does not leave my belly once doing the night except for the hours he has to guarding the area we sleep in. I am so happy that he found me when he did as things would have been bad if he had not. Thanks god.
Good night diary.

Day 233

Dear diary
Niklas tells me we cannot go to spring water lake and forrest yet because they have been told to keep searching for survivors and food in the area so the army can set up a new base in the area soon. I asked him if we could go back to the bunker, as I was sure the aliens would not attack the same place twice but Niklas told me that was the first place that he had been searching for me and with all the death people in the area, he would not go there again. He continued and told me that the bunker had also been hit by the laser so not much space for the survivors. I guess I understand his problems, he is a good leader to his men and he is doing his best to help the civilians too. I am started to wonder what is going to happen to the earth, are we going to win the war and will people keep working together afterwards or are we going to lose the war and get destroyed. If we get destroyed what will the aliens do to the earth, make it a parking lot for their space ships? Or maybe they are here to save the nature that we could help. I hope this will be the last wars as all the innocent people who has died so far, cannot died in vain for world peace. My mind is so crazy now that I cannot sleep even I need to because my baby needs me fresh for whatever events which will happened tomorrow.
Good night diary.

Day 239

Dear diary
Niklas has finally got permission to travel to the spring water lake and forest area by their high command and I don’t think it is not a moment too early as food is disappearing quickly when you are so many people. We still have plenty but we need something from the trip too as it might take a day or two to get there when we have to hide for the aliens and their machines. I am feeling ready to go but we have decide to go early in the morning instead of this evening. The shooting stars have appeared once more and this time it was just a single one so I believe that it was a good omen about tomorrow instead of more of those aliens. Yes, Niklas talks about that the army has a theory about that the shooting stars was how they entered our world without showing up on our radars and such. I wanted to asked him more about it but my mind was a bit worried to continue as he was one of the people who found the comets who had hit the earth. I am feeling more safe now as he kissed me like he did the day he asked to marry me and he still has plans to do so if the high command will allow him. I guess I have to wait but he promised to be protecting us until then. I asked why not now but he says it is hard to do without a priest which made me ask the other civilians if any of them was a priest but none of them was so like I said I guess to wait. That was the major events for today I guess.
Good night diary.

Day 241

Dear diary
It is now the first evening in the forest near spring water lake and we had fish for dinner as the lake is full of fish. I guess the numbers has grown a lot doing the days without people having chance to do any fishing. The fish taste so much better than the can food that we have been having lately. The camp is still pretty small, I think we are around 15 civilians and five soldiers including Niklas and I. I do not know how their high command expected the five soldier to search an entire town for survivors but I am not a soldier so I do not get to ask those questions. We have not been attack by the aliens yet so guess that is good. I hope I am not jinx it now that I said it. The place is already nice as we have a few tents for all the people, Niklas told me to join the civilians in the tents as he and the soldiers had to sleep outside tonight. Guess that would be the first night since we found each other that he will not sleep with his hands on my belly. I wanted to sleep outside but he was not sure it would be good for the baby. I am the female here and the baby have survived attacks from aliens and such already, so I am not worried about it, beside I have missed him so much while he has been gone so I do not want to leave him. Anyway my energy is low from all the camping set up and so on, so will sleep now.
Good night diary.

Day 251

Dear diary
Today I am so annoyed if not pissed as today I overheard Niklas getting new orders from high command and they were to help some soldiers in an outpost 2 days away from here, just because every thing is too slow here. I do not mind that Niklas has to do his job as the army tell him to do but that he is going to try doing it without telling me he is leaving and when I finally make him say that he is leaving then I cannot get permission to join him because he finds me a perfect leader for the civilians. Like I care about any of them if I am not having Niklas around me too. Then Niklas uses the excuse that I am pregnant which was the final straw and I tell him that he is not going anywhere without me. The yelling voice of mine, makes him finally understand how much I care for him and that I am not leaving his side again. One of the other civilians overhears our argument and quickly says that he can be the leader while we travel to the outpost to figure out what is going on down there. Niklas want to say no to the man but he knows that he is out of options so we are leaving tomorrow and the man, Matt, I guess is the leader of the civilians until we return. My eyes are full of tears at the moment and I am sad that Niklas and I had to argue about his job, guess I just cannot continue my life without him and if he is going to die, I want to be near him with it happens.
Good night diary.

Day 257

Dear diary
The soldier, Niklas and I have no been at the place high command told Niklas to go for 4 days and even with all the searching that Niklas and his soldiers has done, we have found nothing that indicates that their have been soldiers here recently. The noice from the building slowly breaking into more pieces is more annoying that the sound of the shooting starts so I have asked Niklas when we are going back to the camp and at first he was like that I could just have stayed back there if I did not want to be here in the first place but now after high command could not give him new info, he has decide to full back as he felt the civilians was in need of him instead. The high command sounded pissed in the other end but Niklas just turned it off and kiss my forehead and belly before walking out to his men and told them to pack their things so they were ready to go back to the forest at first sun light tomorrow. Not one of them asked or said anything against the order so guess I am not the only one who wants to go home. Of other things then no much have happened here, last night it rained but house we are sleeping in, managed to keep us dry even it had a big hole in the roof. The baby is still kicking but I have no idea how it is inside there now as I do not have any midwife or books to read about pregnancy because of those stupid aliens. I asked Niklas if we could go to the library in a new by town but he would not waste resources on trying to find a bot about and because I did not want to argue with him so quickly after our last one I decide to let him win. I think everything is going well anyway because why else would my belly grow and still being able to feel him kicking. I guess Niklas will sleep with a hand on my belly again tonight.
Good night diary.

Day 263

Dear diary
I do not know how to write this down on paper, let alone clean it from my mind as I am so chocked about what happened that I do not know what to say or think. Niklas did the right thing by not shooting him as even we are still a man less because of it then we cannot waste human lives when there is an alien war going on. I guess I can make myself write it now. One of Niklas’s men tried to rape me earlier today by forcing down my pants and panties before bending me over. I managed to scream for help before he could do anything naughty against me and in the next Niklas is there pulling him away. The man said sorry right away but Niklas did not listen at first and just pulled him away from me and the tent so I could get my clothes back on in peace. A heard a gunshot and for a moment I thought he had decide to shot the man but he was just going to explain every body that we was not going to do things like this in the camp and then he decides to kick the man out of the camp with only his outfit, a small handgun, a knife and some food. The man asked to come back and he even tried to look at me with sorry eyes but I was too hurt back then to even care about his faint. I am glad that Niklas did not shoot him even I was the one who was getting hurt and I know I am repeating myself but we need to show ourself as humans or the aliens will win soon. I hope that I can sleep without nightmares now.
Good night diary.

Day 269

Dear diary
Guess one accident never comes alone even it has been a few days since Niklas forces out one of his soldiers out of the camp because he tried to rape me. I am still glad Niklas managed to spare his life and who knows maybe he comes back. Anyway the reason I said that one accident never happens alone is because today the aliens found us and destroyed most of the camp so even it is raining I am sleeping outside tonight. They destroyed our camp pretty badly but for some reason only a few of us was hurt doing the fight so not sure what they really wanted to do as if I was an enemy force, trying to conquer a world I would not stop after destroying the camp. Anyway I am happy they did and tomorrow we will start to rebuild the things as Niklas finds the place too good to leave behind. I am not sure I should write this but I overheard Niklas do a count of ammo and it does not sound good so I hope some army soon arrives and save us unless we have to go somewhere to find it. The only problem about that is that we are round 2 days from the mall and as you know the mall is not safe for us as it is inside the town. I guess I just have to start praying for the good things to start happening even that I am super happy Niklas and I is together. The attack made me believe in god once more. I am normally not praying every evening but starting today I am and will not stop before the war is over or I am dead. I hope the night will be peaceful as the rain really makes my eyes heavy even that my belly is being kicked from the inside.
Good night diary.

Day 271

Dear diary
Now we are only 4 people in the camp. Do not worry, we have not been attack by aliens or other ways of getting killed by the guy, I think his name was Matt, who was the temporary leader while we checked out the outpost, has been talking and asking the civilians around us if they believe in Niklas and his 3 remaining soldiers can defend them against the aliens once more if they come back. Surprisingly none of the civilians except me feels safe even I was the one who almost get raped and the only person who is pregnant as most of the others is guys. Niklas tried to calm down the people but it did not work so instead he tried to use force which was a bad idea as it just ended up making the other people feel like they was force to stay even that Niklas just tried to explain them that things was not safe outside the camp. In the end I had to step in to stop him and Matt from fighting each other which made Niklas ask me if I wanted to stay with him or go with the civilians. My heart dropped as I felt that it was the most stupid question he could ask in the whole wide world as I love him so much that I will stay until the end and beside how would the civilians defend themselves without guns or anything else with power. Matt said that he would rather take the chance to find the army we was waiting for instead of staying in the area after the aliens attack. So far we had no reason to believe that the aliens would attack again after they was fought back the first time and beside the camp was still a mess now so why would they even think humans would live there and lastly why would they come outside the town once more. Matt was not giving up his plan off leaving so they left without us and now I am back to sleep under some blanket we use as tent and all is more quiet without the 15 or so civilians also trying to sleep.
Good night diary.

Day 277

Dear diary
It has been a quiet week since the civilians left the area. Niklas has been sending out his men trying to get the back but it has been hard to track them plus those they found was still not ready to return so now we are just trying to live our own lives even that high command told Niklas to find so many civilians as possible. I am confused about why Niklas and the men did not follow them. I even asked Niklas about and he said there is nothing safe around her so as long the food is in from of fish and others things then he would not leave. I guess that people can have their mind set in one thing until some event changes it and today we watched 2 planes fly over our heads. Niklas quickly decide he want us to follow them even we had no idea of where they came from or where they was going. I do not mind about this but we have to think of my pregnancy so I cannot march or what type of walking the soldiers normal do. Maybe if we are lucky they are guiding us to the army we are waiting for or something even better. Niklas says they have to be close to an airport or aircraft carrier even that our minds do not remember any airports nearby or water big enough for the carrier. We have been walking 30kilometres the way they was flying and both my feet and belly hurts so badly. I wish we could find a car to drive. I forgot to say it was a protector plane or rather two so they would not be alone according to what Niklas know about the planes with such short notices. I want to sleep now so I can walk even more tomorrow.
Good night diary.

Day 281

Dear diary
Today was another day of good and bad news and since I am the write and so far the only reader of this novel I have decide to just mix of the news and tell then in one story. We have found the airport where the planes arrived from but the place has already been destroyed by the aliens, which of course is sad and bad for humans but we found a lot of food to eat and other good things such as ammo for the guns and rifles we are using to defend ourself with. Guess the aliens did not destroy it as they did not know what we used it for. My legs hurts like crazy now and I am glad to finally rest again after all our walking the past days. I am sure my baby is thinking that too. Niklas is trying to figure out if this was the airport the places was from or if it is an other one. The high command is not answering his calls so I guess he is also worried if things are bad with the army. I am a little worried myself but as long as I am with Niklas I do not care much about the events around us no matter if it is sad, more destruction or what ever those aliens can find out. It been a long time since I had the chance to focus on the star without fall asleep right away so I guess I will do that after writing this diary. The baby is for sure alive and kicking so maybe I will try to get Niklas to join us so we can be a family again before bed time.
Good night diary.

Day 283

Dear diary
Niklas found a room full of canned food so now he is sending out his men to look for survivors as he still wants to complete the mission that army has put out for him and his men. Because of the ammo we found I have gotten permission to try fire a few rounds. It is a bit hard while carrying a baby too but I manage to hit the target anyway. Not inside the centre like I would normally but still close enough to hopefully kill the alien. I wanted to shoot more times but one of the soldiers returned with a woman named Rosetta, who happened to be a midwife, who told me that I needed rest instead of shooting guns. She said that the noise from the gun would maybe make the baby be born deaf. I have never heard about such nonsense before but before I could do anything against it was Niklas taken away my gun and told me go rest like the woman said. I did as she told and she came up to me and felt with her fingers on her belly to figure out if it everything was good inside. Rosetta said she would not be able to tell for sure without the right equipment but what she could feel, felt right. I was so happy that I almost forgot I was angry at her for getting my gun taken away. Niklas and I decide talk about names afterwards and he thought it could be nice the name him after my father Brain if it was a boy. I was happy he wanted to honour my father if it was a boy. Do you have a good name if a girl too I asked and he smiled, what about Juno and I was smiling all over my face as I had always dreamt of a child named Juno, but have not told Niklas yet. Anyway it is time to watch stars one more night while being on guard post together with Niklas.
Good night diary.

Day 293

Dear diary
I do not know what to write today as I am have just been lazy all day because the midwife Rosetta found it a bad idea to do anything wild when I had the baby inside. Niklas cares so much about our future baby that he demanded that I just stayed in this bed thing and eat the food that he brings me. Funny how a new woman can change so many things in in so short time. I feel that I love Niklas so I guess I have no reason to write this but Rosetta is older than both me and Niklas so no worries about him suddenly cheats on me with her but maybe one of his army guys wants her or maybe the guy who tried to rape me, wants her. I wonder what happened to him as he left the camp as told and we have not seen any dead body that looks like him even we have seen tanks, jeeps and soldiers death or destroyed anywhere. I have seen kids too but I try not to focus on them and just focus on my own life and the future as I cannot change what happens doing the alien war anyway as I am no soldier plus I am almost 28 weeks pregnant if I have not miss counted. So I am just trying to be a woman in this mess. The shooting stars on the sky cannot decide if they want to come a lot or want to stay away and those who come has been coming lately has been silence so all good except for the red lasers in the sky. I wonder if they are laser weapons like those in Star Wars or not. I would ask Niklas but I am not sure I would get an answer from him. Anyway Niklas is here now so I wanna rest with him.
Good night diary.

Day 307

Dear diary
Today was both a happy day and sad day because the bad news demands we find something to transport me in or we will not get far north. Ups forgot to say what happened in the north since we need something to transport me which is the good news. The radio suddenly started board casting and it told that an army of the remaining nations is being created in the north as the aliens do not like the snow and cold weather up there so if anyone alive they can join up in the army and help taking back the country and the world afterwards. They also promised hep to those injured or otherwise not able to join the army. Niklas said we had to go there and quickly send out his men to find some transport before leaving me with Rosetta. This was the first time I have been alone with a woman since the time at the bunker so it was a bit weird too me as I use to just give commands to Niklas and his men like I was their boss. She told me she used to have a boyfriend too but he died doing the attack at our capital and in attempt to escape the mess, she had been walking all the way here as she knew about the airport and wanted to fly away as she had been taking fly lessons for fun. I told her to leave me, to check if there was any plane not destroyed left but she told me that she had already checked back when she arrived and back then the airport was already destroyed. The reason we had not found her there was because she had been searching for survivors or a bunker to stay inside instead of the open area. I have never heard of a so cool woman before. I am such a weakling compared to her and been so lucky to get help the times I needed. Anyway Niklas and his men are back home now without anything to drive but they have found some gas so they have something for the transport later on. It is late now so will try to rest as Niklas told he would do the first shift.
Good night diary.

Day 311

Dear diary
Time is working against us as today we noticed some of the food has started to rot and rats has been going thought some of the fresh so we are no longer having as much food as we expect even that Niklas says we can eat the rats. I hope he is joking as there is no chance I will eat that kind of animal. On the other hand we have found some more gasoline for the transport so I am sure we have enough once we find something to drive. Of other news the radio broad casted the same news as the other day just this time it was a female speaker instead of a male the first time. I hope that the guy who was speaking the first time is still alive as such a change really makes your mind go crazy about what could have happen. Rosetta told me a story about her childhood to keep my mind away from the problems. She talked about she once travelled to USA and visited the statue of liberty. I have never been there but I always loved the green colour the statue has got over the years. I wonder if it still stands or the aliens has destroyed it all ready. Anyway back to the story. She told me that the day she visited it, there had been people in millions because it was the first day the view point had been opened since the terror attack 11. September 2001. She managed to get up there anyway so she was able to watch New York from a distance like immigrates back in the day when they reached the town in an attempt to become Americans. I am glad to hear stories form… Niklas and his men is back with one, is being carried, he has lost so much blood…
Good night diary.

Day 313

Dear diary
Sorry for my choice of words but my mind has been fucked up since we lost a soldier because a small group of the aliens appears and they managed to kill one of the soldiers. Niklas has been blaming himself and his sleep has been full of nightmares and I have not been able to sleep much because of it but there are still good news today or rather mixed news. The soldier who tried to rape me and Niklas sent away, has suddenly appeared as he had learned about the airport and tried to find it. So he found us that way. I know Niklas would have sent him away if it had not been because he was driving a truck with room for all of us so we can finally go north and join the army there. We need a few days to prepare or rather nights as Niklas do not want us to be out in the open doing the day because of the attack. I am still having mixed feelings about him rejoining our group but now there is Rosetta and I know she is not obliged to do anything with the man but maybe they can do something to let off his steam or what ever it is call. He came right over to me to explain how sorry he still was about the event and I took the excuse but still having second thoughts if this was a good idea or not. I even thought so far that I would shot the man to get the truck but after seeing what a death soldier does to Niklas I will not try it. I have decide that even if Rosetta says it is a bad idea I still want help pack the truck so we can get to safety faster. Maybe aliens reappears and only time will tell if we made a good choice or not about the soldier.
Good night diary.

Day 317

Dear diary
We have now started our journey to the north even that we have no idea off where to go other than go north. The food is already low so hope we find the place soon and because of the low amount of food I will not write unless major things happens. I do this to help my baby and I to be able to survive the longest. Rosetta says, it is a good idea and since she is supposed to know things like that then I have to believe her. I have already been dreaming about the day Niklas and I was meeting each other for the first time. It was a cold spring day where the trees have started to spring out but most trees was still just brown. I was out running in a forest area when I fell and twisted my foot. I tried to walk but the pain was too much so I wanted to call for help but had forgotten my phone at home so I was all alone on the path. I started to wonder how long before someone would miss me, but because I was alone at my apartment no one would miss me except if they tried to call me. Rain started to fall so I tried to stand on my foot again and this time I was able to keep standing even the pain was really strong. I walked slowly and was so focused on the pain that I did not notice that Niklas was walking against me and he was having eyes form something else so suddenly we bumped into each other and I landed on my bad foot, making me scream loudly of pain. Tears started to run fast down my cheeks even I tried to focus on something else than the pain. Niklas knew I was hurt so he just tried to help me up again. He was so kind to take me to the hospital so I guess we fell for each other as we already went on our first date after my hospital visit. I am glad I am able to dream such good dreams in these hard times.
Good night diary.

Day 331

Dear diary
Sorry for leaving you alone for 14 days but my energy was so low that I could not make myself write anything inside you yet. You did not miss anything other than today we found food so my energy is back again which is why I am writing. But as the bad things we are out of gas while we still have not seen any sight of the army or anything. Before you might say were can you drive north for 14 days without reaching anywhere then I just want to say that we drive at night and we did it very slowly to be sure the aliens did not notice us if they was nearby. I guess we have reach around 500km to north of our starting point and the only new thing we have seen since we left is snow. I like snow even it is cold when you try to survive. I hope Niklas, the baby and I can go ice skating, play snow fights or build a snow man in the future if all this war has not ruined the earth too much for us to live on. I am glad that the soldier found us with the truck as I would not have been able so far without some way of getting transported. Niklas is still annoyed on him for trying to rape me but he knows that I would have been dead now if he did not drive us. The other soldiers acts like nothing have happen since he left the forest camp and is already talking about old times and things they have experienced. Niklas is still quiet about what have happen to him between the time we have been away from each other and that worries me a bit. I am glad he lives so what more can I ask for. Niklas on the other hand is trying to get our radio working and it is taking its told on me too, more than his silence about the period we was spilt up. Anyway my belly calls me to sleep so will try to do that.
Good night diary.

Day 337

Dear diary
I supposed to be asleep now and Niklas, his men and midwife Rosetta all think I do but how am I going to sleep in this noise. They are yelling at each other but mostly at Niklas as they question his motives behind his actions. If you wonder what action they talk about then I can say it with one word “me”. They are blaming him for me being the reason that we are stuck here far away from anything with almost no food and no army in sight. I want to stand up and defend myself but my belly and low energy is not helping me so I have try to sleep instead. Tears are running down my cheeks as I am writing this as I do not want to be the reason for all the bad things happening. Blame the aliens instead as if we start blaming ourself the aliens will win easily as only a united humankind can beat them and force them away from our world. I am sorry that I m pregnant and I am sorry that you have to live with me like this while the world is breaking down around us but I want to be the good wife and just walk away. I just have to wait for them to sleep even I am not sure how I will get past our guard for the night. I am sorry that Niklas has to go though all this pain and I have been so focused on myself that I forgot about his feelings and what is worse I forgot about my mom who I still have not seen since the attack on the bunker. I wonder what happened to her, I wonder if she is still alive somewhere thinking about me and her grandchild. I hope she is still alive in some camp. Enough writing about what is happening and let me clear my eyes for all the tears and focus on the stars for a moment. Please

Day 347

Dear diary
I do not know how to start the diary today as the last thing I remember was writing this diary and in the next I wake up in a military hospital and now I am all alone again as they say I am the only one who survived the aliens attacking. ´They have no idea of where Niklas and the others are and because I am pregnant none of the leaders of this camp will allow me to go back there even after telling them that I am a good shooter so they only need to give a gun and maybe a soldier or two. I always miss Niklas and I understand why as they tell me that it has been 10 days since they found me laying on the ground with a weak heart rate and when they found out I was pregnant they decide to try save me even they did not have unlimited equipment for that like a normal hospital but they have heard about an army being gathered in the north so they expect to win the war soon and have the needed equipment soon again. I still want to go but for now it is impossible because I am chained to the bed and only got permission to write my diary as they understood the it meant the world to me after reading some of the pages. I knew that soldiers was human when I meet Niklas but after the episode with the soldier who watched me as a woman for him to play with I missed the feeling a bit. I also miss my mother but I have not seen her in ages now so I fear the worst so now I just want to escape this place and return to the place where we was attack to find out if Niklas is dead or not. If I do not find out I guess I have nothing except for Niklas jr. to live for. Yes I know the sex of my child now and he is healthy. Please please let me find his father so we can be family in the future if those annoying aliens allows me. It is time Ito rest as I am about to get taken my diary away once more.
Good night diary.

Day 349

Dear diary
I guess I have to stay here even I want to find Niklas again and my mother Viola too even she has been gone longer than Niklas. I know it has been a while since I written my mother with name but I feel that I am slowly forgetting her even that I do not want to. She is in my heart together with my father and all I have to remember them by is what I have written inside this dairy and the rock my father gave me. If I died against the aliens I hope I will meet them in the heavens even my faint is broken by all the destruction by the aliens. I do not know why we cannot search for them as the army I am with now is far bigger than the small groups I was with doing the time before Niklas and the time with Niklas too. I know we was a lot of civilians in the end but still Niklas and his men did more than this army. They are waiting for an army which are getting created further north as the aliens do not like the weather up there, I have been asked if I wanted to go there but at the moment I want to search for Niklas and Viola if I get the chance. They want to send me away because I am pregnant and they worry I will use too much energy waiting plus the north has more places for someone like me. Good thing they are not forcing me to go and respect my feelings. I give got a gun to use against the aliens as they have heard by other survivors that I am a good shooter… I asked them for a rifle but for now I am only allowed to carry a normal gun, they talk about low numbers of ammo and guess they are worried that if they give me too many things I might go search for Niklas and Viola on my own. I am pregnant but want to help in anyway I can. Niklas jr. tells me it is bed time now as he stopped kicking now.
Good night diary.

Day 353

Dear diary
Today marks a day with sorrow and yeah I know many people has died trying to defend the world and I have no idea of what happened to Niklas but the commander just came down to my tent to tell me in person that my old home town has been destroyed in a laser strike from the aliens so if my mother was anywhere near it, she is dead and gone now. Tears is running down my cheeks as I did not expect all of this to happen and she was so close to make it out alive with me. The commander also told me that even if she has returned to the bunker then there would be no chance of her surviving the attack. Why are you not firing the stupid laser’s on this camp so I can see all my lost ones in heavens. I am so tired of all the death and killing around me, when are people going to join force just like they do in that alien movie from the 90’s were the aliens also has laser’s. I guess we are just a weak little planet who has no wishes of live together and coexist, maybe that is why they attacked us as we seemed like a walk over for them. But at least we are still here 200 days later. Sorry I am just so lost after I heard that my home and all the people I knew is all gone, I feel like am all alone in this world and I even that Niklas is out there I still rather wait on him in heavens. I am sorry for sounding cold but how would you feel if you lost your mother without having a chance to say goodbye to her. This diary was supposed to be a happy one and now it is almost broke by all the damage. Guess I am only thinking about me and me alone at the moment as things are falling down are around me… me, ME, Meeeee, always me, only me, why me, give me, take me. Sorry I have to stop writing for today now before I become crazy
Good night diary.

Day 359

Dear diary
Now the year has almost gone since I started this diary and I never expected the year to be that crazy like it has been. I did not expect the aliens, the shooting stars or that I am soon going to be a mother. The only thing I expected was the wedding and since I have not heard from Niklas since day 337 I guess that is off unless some magic happens. My mom is gone too, so I wonder why I am the only one from my town who are still alive. The soldier are all looking at me and my belly guess they dream about women like me as I am one of the few here in the camp. The many of the others has already been sent away on trucks. I have gotten permission to stay because I am waiting on Niklas as many of the other civilians are already together with their husbands. I do not know when I will go but I know that on my wedding day I am going to sneak out of the camp and hide this diary so people in the area can find it and maybe learn about what happened in the first days. My hand is having a hard time writing now as I just watched a shooting star and I am worried that the aliens are on their way now like they was the other times if they have anything to do with them. There was another already and can hear the soldiers getting ready for something as they are making lots of noise compared to some of the other evenings. I hope they can protect me even I was stupid enough to stay here as I know deep inside my heart that Niklas is not returning and I will be a mother all by myself. I hope it will be a fresh boy so I can name him after his wonderful father. I will of course add junior like others so people know he had a father but on the other hand I am not sure how I can take care of him now in this mad world. I know it is not the end yet but thanks diary for helping me though the pains and sorrows that the aliens has brought me. I better get some sleep now.
Good night diary.

Day 367

2, 3, 5, 7, 11, 13, 17, 19, 23, 29, 31, 37, 41, 43, 47, 53, 59, 61, 67, 71, 73, 79, 83, 89, 97, 101, 103, 107, 109, 113, 127, 131, 137, 139, 149, 151, 157, 163, 167, 173, 179, 181, 191, 193, 197, 199, 211, 223, 227, 229, 233, 239, 241, 251, 257, 263, 269, 271, 277, 281, 283, 293, 307, 311, 313, 317, 331, 337, 347, 349, 353, 359