Day 607

Dear diary

You would not believe how good it feels to be back in Niklas arms even that he is not giving me the only thing I want. I want to go back to my father’s camp and so we all three can be reunited even my father might ask what happened to Dan. I have not told Niklas about Dan yet as I worry my old flame for Niklas will get suffocated by his jealously as he was very jealous back in the days before the war and except for some aliens that showed me that humans cannot work together then what has changed. I know he was gone and that he has not told me what happened that day yet but I am sure that whatever the reason was then he had a very good reason or reasons to leave me behind. Maybe he thought he would save our baby. My eyes is getting wet just by the thought of it even I have done my best to keep my mind away from the subject. But to handle my sorrow I have decide to name him Randon which means wolf-shield as I feel he would have protected his mother against the aliens if he had to. I wish I could revive him, Dan and my mother so we all could be a happy family even Dan would not have been in my life if Niklas had not disappeared. I am not sure what to call him if he was a girl but it does not matter as it is dead.By the way I am glad to have you diary as it helps me get some of my heavy throughs out of my head.